Dare to Dream

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Dare to Dream

"The dream was always running ahead of me. To catch up, to live for a moment in unison with it, that was the miracle."
- Anais Nin

"To accomplish great things, we must not only act, but also dream; not only plan, but also believe."
- Anatole France

"Dream no small dreams for they have no power to move the hearts of men."
- Goethe

"Dreams are the touchstones of our character."
- Henry David Thoreau

Do you hold the key to your dreams?

Bleach: Episode 263

biography

I am Cai Biyuan, 24 years old.
I am currently studying in Republic Polytechnic, for a Diploma in Game Design.
It is one of my passions in life, that drives me on.

I wanted to be a soccer player.
I wanted to be a musician.
I want to be a game designer.

I am still looking for the sign,
that will enlighten me, and tell me who I am supposed to be,
what I am supposed to achieve in this life.

bibliography

Christian Gospel Mission Kindergarten (1989-1990)
Bukit Panjang Primary School (1991-1996)
Swiss Cottage Secondary School (1997-2001)
Yishun Junior College (2002-2003)
Nanyang Technological University (2006-2008)
Republic Polytechnic (2009-Present)

favourites

Sports: Soccer, Bowling, Table Tennis, Badminton, Tennis
Soccer Club: Leicester City (English Championship 2009/10)
Hobbies: Reading novels, watching animes, programming, playing computer games
Computer games: World of Warcraft, Counter-Strike, Unreal Tournament, Final Fantasy VII-VIII-X
Anime: Bleach

Chinese singers/bands: 周杰伦 Jay Chou, 五月天 Mayday, 周华健 Emil Chau, 陶喆 David Tao, 王力宏 Wang Li-Hom,
陈晓东 Daniel Chan, 张信哲 Jeff Chang, 呂建中 Tank Lu, B.A.D., 南拳妈妈, 林俊杰 JJ Lin

English singers/bands: Chris Brown, Secondhand Serenade, Backstreet Boys, A1, Westlife, T.I, Justin Timberlake
Linkin Park, Daughtry, David Cook, Kelly Clarkson, Blue, Eminem, Avril Lavigne, 5ive, Simple Plan

Chinese songs: 01. 周杰伦 - 擱淺 (2004)                    | 06. 周杰伦 - 楓 (2005)
                          02. 呂建中 - 如果我變成回憶 (2009)  | 07. 五月天 - 倔强 (2004)
                          03. 五月天 - 超人 (2004)                    | 08. 林俊杰 - 一千年以后 (2005)
                          04. 王力宏 - 流泪手心 (1999)             | 09. 陈晓东 - 風一樣的男子 (1999)
                          05. 周华健 - 讓我歡喜讓我憂 (1991)  | 10. 陶喆 - 愛很簡單 (1997)

English songs: 01. 5ive - Closer to Me (2001)                           | 06. Daughtry - Home (2007)
                        02. A1 - Everytime (1999)                                  | 07. Backstreet Boys - Don't Wanna Lose You Now (1999)
                        03. Secondhand Serenade - Your Call (2008)  | 08. David Cook - Permanent (2008)
                        04. Simple Plan - Save You (2008)                    | 09. Backstreet Boys - Spanish Eyes (1999)
                        05. Westlife - If I Let You Go (1999)                  | 10. Avril Lavigne - I'm With You (2002)

Monday, September 14, 2009

I'm back from Batam! Actually I was already home and dry Sunday evening but I was lazy, plus I was fixing up my

computer with new gadgets ^_^. I had my brother buy a new video card (which I found out later I didn't really need it...)

and a new sound card (which in the end was also quite redundant...) Anyways, I am going to split up the post into 2

parts, because it is going to be a loooooooooooooong one.

Batam

Batam is a very laid-back place. My friend calls it 'Lazytown'. There isn't much happening around there, and we did not

see a lot of people around. The places there aren't very developed at all; apart from the hotels and the shopping malls,

the rest of the area are run-down buildings, shacks or the wilderness itself. Even the roads are not maintained; some

parts of the roads are filled with potholes, others not even normals roads at all. There are no traffic rules over at Batam;

traffic lights are just decorations to the locals. On many occasions, I can see families of 4 cramming onto a small

motorcycle and travelling on the roads, even infants.

Due to the lack of facilities there, we didn't really do much in the time we were there, apart from eating and some

shopping. If anything, the cost of living is really low there; you can buy a section of the supermarket there with S$100.

One wall's magmum classic ice-cream costs just S$0.50; I couldn't remember the last time I had ice-cream for less

than a dollar. Most of the items that we took a look at barely cost above S$1.00; and so we bought a load of tidbits,

as well as other items. I learnt from my Indonesian friend that the working pay there is really low; the minimum wage

there is S$160. However, there are children working and getting paid less than half of that, if at all. That probably

explains the low prices, and also explains why the locals are so excited to be around foreigners; it means quick (and

good) money for them. A 30-minute taxi ride to the city costs us around S$13.50, which to us may not be much, but

to them it is a lot of money.

The Trip

I reached Harbour Front at 8.00am, and was supposed to meet my friends for breakfast before the ferry trip. It was

one of my rare trips there (I don't even go to Sentosa!) so I didn't know where to go. My friends weren't helpful either;

all they said was "I am at departure, meet at 3rd level unit 50". I was thinking: there's a building called departure?

Nope was the answer, after checking the local map. After a few more calls, I found the location (no one could

remember the name of the place at all geez). My friend Wenrong was collecting the tickets, and she was not really

pleased that all of us were late (in my defense, I was lost, not late). Her boyfriend was worse: "Your friends think we

are what, their travel agents ar?" Haha, he is not that bad lar, just upset that we couldn't keep the time. We met up

and had McDonald's for breakfast, after which we went to the departure gates. Somehow, the agency messed up

my IC number and my passport number, so I had to go back to the agency, reprint another ticket, and then queue again

for the check-in. The ferry ride reminded me a bit of the time when I was in the army boarding the ferry ride to

Pulau Tekong :p.

The ferry ride was about an hour long, and Batam was 1 hour in time behind Singapore, meaning we reached Batam

at about 10am local time. The bus trip from the ferry terminal to Holiday Inn took less than 5 minutes, and throughout

the journey we barely saw a building; most of it were unused land or fields that were not maintained. We were ready to

check in at the hotel, to receive the first of many screw-ups by the hotel: due to an administration error, they only have

one room for us (we originally booked three 1-bedroom suites). After 45 minutes of delays and checks, they managed

to get us upgraded rooms. However, one of the rooms was on another block, meaning two of us will have to take the

lift down, walk to another block just to meet up. In the end, Litong and I shared a room, while the others

(Wenrong, her boyfriend T.C, Angela and Desmond) stayed in the 2-bedroom suite. We left the room that was on another

block vacant. After unloading our things, we tried to contact our friend, but none of the phones in the hotel can be

used for free; a call from our hotel will cost us S$4.50.

In the meantime, we went to Nagoya, the Batam City Centre, to eat on the recommendation of one of the concierge

people. Apparently, cheap and good food takes on a different meaning to the people there. Sure, the food was cheap, but

as for the 'good' part, it left a lot to be desired. We ordered curry fish head, fish soup, fried sotong, some vegetables

and fried chicken, and only the fried chicken can qualify as being 'good'. The others thought the vegetables was 'bitter'

though Litong and I thought it was okay, so we were the only ones eating that. The fish soup was very salty,

but the ingredients were loaded.

After the meal, we crossed the road to a shopping mall and took a walk there. I saw people selling pirated PS2

games (I thought I saw a set showing Final Fantasy VII), and according to my brother the demand is still there because

quite a number of people are reluctant to upgrade to PS3s as yet. The shopping mall is okay, but also because we

only had a little time we didn't really look around much. We did spend the longest time at the supermarket though, because

some of us were still hungry after the meal. The arcade there was bad; most of the games I saw were at least

5 years old. We all bought magmum ice-cream for S$0.50 to eat; I am pretty sure we would have brought a truckload

back home if it wouldn't melt.

On finishing the ice-cream, we crossed the road again to go to a massage parlour. Of all things, they decided to

choose a 1 1/2 hr package; I chose not to go for the massage, meaning I had to wait for them there >_>. I killed half the

time watching a Malay movie while trying not to fall asleep; I spent the other half playing games on my handphone.

That done, it was still only 4.30pm local time, so we decided to go back to the hotel. My Indonesian friend had an

emergency to tend to and so he couldn't meet up with us yet. We took a discounted trip back; the return trip cost $5,000

rupiah less. The trip back was a hair-raising experience. Our taxi driver drives like a kid; he didn't seem like he

knows the road at all (we were following our friends on another taxi) and there was this one time, he was travelling

fast and didn't see a pothole until the last minute, and in his panic he swerved hard. We almost went off the road,

but luckily he managed to regain control of the taxi before we did. Litong, Angela and I were silent for the remainder

of the journey, only conversing in Chinese (HAHA) to say how bad this driver was.

Upon reaching the hotel (after what seemed like an eternity), we dropped off the things, and decided to go for a

steam bath and sauna. It was my first time, and if there is actually a benefit to these things, I would like to know.

I was okay with the sauna, but the steam from the steam bath is quite choking, and though I got used to it in a while,

I wasn't inclined to talk because of it. After the session, we bathed and then met the girls for dinner at the hotel. It was

expensive and horrible. A lot of the things taste bad, even things that you can't go wrong with. The mint sauce tasted

funny, the roast chicken is cold and hard (probably on display for too long), and the goreng pisang was bad as well

(to top it off, T.C ordered 3 for himself). For almost S$50, it was money thrown down the drain. I ate a lot of beef though,

and fruits ^_^.

After the horrible meal, we were about to call it a day. It was then our Indonesian friend told us he will pick us up. We

wanted to tell him to come over instead, because we were unwilling to go to his pub already lol (most of us were

changed and ready to crawl into our beds). In the end, we relented because it was our main purpose in coming here in the

first place. It was good to see Setiawan, because it has been 6 years since I last saw him, after we graduated from

YJC. He hasn't changed much, though he picked up smoking (I guess it was inevitable considering the work he is in).

His pub was a 15-minute drive from our hotel, and it was, well, different from the pubs you will see in Singapore. It has

no air-con, only fans and people smoke freely there. The place is owned by him, his brother and his god-brother,

but he only oversees the operations occasionally; he mainly helps his father in his digital printing work. The music there

was deafening, and the singers there scream their throats out, not sing. However, the male singer there is apparently

one of the top 20 Indonesian Idols, and I can really hear that he is good, because he can go to the higher octaves with

ease. Setiawan mentions that to do business in Indonesia, you need a lot of connections, and it seems the case because

everyone was coming to us and shaking hands on seeing we're friends with Setiawan, although Wenrong calls

them 'freeloaders' because they are drinking the wine and not paying for it haha. I downed 7 glasses of Chivas and

1 glass of I-don't-know-what with lemon, and I still wasn't drunk, just light-headed.

At 1am local time, we finally left the place, and Setiawan came over to our rooms to chat a bit more. Litong fell

asleep at the bathtub while bathing haha, and Angela puked a little because she couldn't drink a lot. At 3am, I finally slept

after a long day. The next day, we had tidbits for breakfast (apart from Desmond who woke up super early to have

breakfast buffet provided for by the hotel). Then we checked out smoothly, and not long after at 2.30pm local time, we

were out of Batam.

Overall, it was a good trip, and I got to go overseas for the first time in more than a decade. Setiawan is coming

over to Singapore on Thursday, so we might meet up again =)

Labels: batam

it's 10:40 PM now

-----------------------------------------------------------

Songs

This section is dedicated to songs I've written, good or bad.
They are probably going to be 'emo' songs, because I like to write songs about my feelings.

I Don't Stand A Chance

I've never been the mainstream guy
Never been the one who stands out, from the crowd
I've never been the fall-back guy
Never been the one who makes you laugh, when you cry

I stand by your side and watch your every move
So I can be there when you fall down

I only wanna see you smile
Never wanna see the sky come down, in your world
I only wanna hear you laugh
Never wanna hear the thunderstorm, in your dream

It hurts me so much but I've to hide it from you
I hope you will forgive me, my dear

(chorus)
I know I don't stand a chance with you in this life
Wooooooo Woooooooo
I know it's hard but I still want you in my life
Wooooooo Woooooooo

It's falling apart, I'm falling deeper
Into the never-ending pit of love
It's one step too far, I cannot climb up
Now there's no way back for me, can't look back, oh no

(chorus)
I know I don't stand a chance with you in this life
Wooooooo Woooooooo
I know it's hard but I still want you in my life
Wooooooo Woooooooo

I know I should stop thinking of you here and now
Wooooooo Woooooooo
I know it's hard but I just can't live without you
Wooooooo Woooooooo

I know I don't stand a chance with you in this life
Wooooooo Woooooooo
I know it's hard but I still want you in my life
Wooooooo Woooooooo

Morality & Mortality

They always say that live and let live is the way to go (mm mm)
Yet why do countless people continue to die in the war
The blood and the tears fill the streets up with despair and pain (oh no)
We're stretched out so thin, we can't give aid to the truly needy (yea)

Why won't we stop taking the lives of the innocent?
Why can't we take a step back and breathe?

(chorus)
Draw from the past, learn from them
We don't have to make the same mistakes again
Time will tell, if we've won
History will hopefully not repeat itself

It's obvious to us that the rich are the ones getting richer (how does that work?)
But aren't the ones that needed help are the poor and the homeless
The filth and the stench fill their homes up with disease and pain (oh my)
They're stretched out so thin, they can barely make ends meet to stay alive

Why won't we start saving the lives of the innocent?
Why can't we take a step back and breathe?

(chorus)
Draw from the past, learn from them
We don't have to make the same mistakes again
Time will tell, if we've won
History will hopefully not repeat itself

Draw from the past, learn from them
We don't have to make the same mistakes again
Time will tell, if we've won
History will hopefully not repeat itself

Your Face

It's 8am, I just woke up
I start to think a lot about you
And I don't know if I could face
The day before me, without you here

I need a moment before I can start to move on

(chorus)
It is hard for me to show
Any emotions in front of you
So I keep them in my heart
And no one will ever know

Know how far I have fallen
Into a never-ending abyss
If I can ever climb up
All I can see is your face

It's past midnight, I lie in bed
I start to think about our past
And I don't know if I could stand
Another minute, without your love

I need to see you right now so I can stop this pain

(chorus)
It is hard for me to show
Any emotions in front of you
So I keep them deep inside
And no one will ever know

Know how far I have fallen
Into a never-ending daydream
If I can ever wake up
all i can see is your face
Your face, your face

I need to tell you how much you really mean to me, but

(chorus)
It is hard for me to show
Any emotions in front of you
So I keep them deep inside
And no one will ever know

Know how far I have fallen
Into a never-ending daydream
If I can ever wake up
All I can see is your face
Your face, your face

I wanna see your face
your face, your face

I will remember your face

Endless Time

Dance in the snow, flying in the wind
You are as free as petals in the air
Drawn to your smile, in love with your scent
I want to be with you to the end of time

(chorus)
Oh my dear, oh my dear
Can I tell you that I love you?
Oh my love, oh my love
Will you tell me you love me too?

~~ Interlude ~~

Bask in the sun, taking in the breeze
You are as calm as palm trees by the sea
Drawn to your gaze, in love with your touch
I hope you will be there til the end of time

(chorus)
Oh my dear, oh my dear
Can I tell you that I miss you?
Oh my love, oh my love
Will you tell me you miss me too?

Oh my dear, oh my dear
Can I tell you that I need you?
Oh my love, oh my love
Will you tell me you need me too?

Lying on the beach, looking at the stars
You were beside me, still as beautiful
I hold your hand, look into your eyes
Say I'll be with you til the end of time

Run and Hide

Baby you should take a look around
There's so many things for you to see
Don't run and hide

Baby you have many friends who care
Who will stop the time to make it right
Please come back home

(chorus)
And you've been hurting in all this time
Broken deep inside
But now is the time for you to show
I know you've come a long way since
You've been down and out
But now you're on the road again

Baby I don't care where you have been
I don't know how you may feel
Don't run and hide

Baby we can stop this happening
Only if you will let us know
Let us help you

(chorus)
And you've been hurting in all this time
Broken deep inside
But now is the time for you to show
I know you've come a long way since
You've been down and out
But now you're on the road again

Oh please God, allow me to find her soon
Let me lend her a helping hand
So she can stop

(chorus)
And she's been hurting in all this time
Broken deep inside
But now is the time for her to show
I know she's come a long way since
She's been down and out
But now she is on the road again

Don't run and hide
Don't run and hide

August Rain

When I was on the verge on breaking down
You were the only one who's on my side
You showed me love and helped to calm me down
I never thanked you for what you have done

The rain was coming down
You had to go back home
And now I have to face this world alone
Tell me

(chorus)
Why did you have to leave me here
Why won't you stay and be with me
Love is a never-ending road
And now I have to walk alone

I never told you I loved you
How I regret not doing so
As I looked up into the sky
That august rain is all that I see

This time last year I was still much alive
So glad and thankful that I still had you
We held on tight and hummed our favorite songs
Talked about how we were meant to be

The rain was coming down
You had to go back home
And now I have to face this world alone
Tell me

(chorus)
Why did you have to leave me here
Why won't you stay and be with me
Love is a never-ending road
And now I have to walk alone

I never told you I loved you
How I regret not doing so
As I looked up into the sky
That august rain is all that I see

That august rain is all that I see

The One

I had a dream last night
I was at the beach, stare into the sea
I saw a girl like you
Who came up to me and held out her hand

And then I ran away (and then I ran away)
And now I wish I could turn back

(chorus)
I was afraid I'm not the one
Who you belong to
I want to be the one you see
The one you kiss
Tonight

I saw you in the class
You were looking out of the window
You seemed to be in pain
Like you've been hurt so bad you stopped living

I want to talk to you (I want to talk to you)
But then I couldn't find my voice

(chorus)
I was afraid I'm not the one
Who you belong to
I want to be the one you see
The one you kiss
Today

I hope to be with you (I hope to be with you)
I guess I'll never see that day

(chorus)
I was afraid I'm not the one
Who you belong to
I want to be the one you see
The one you kiss
Right now